The Healer

I went way downhill, way too fast after the fall
Circling my doubts, recalling it all
every single rotten day from January
to July, only hearing his harshest words.

Each day was longer than the one that came before
and before too long I had nothing
but the bitter sweet substitutes and a closed door.
Walking away from everyone I walked right into you
and when our eyes met, that first fateful glance,
I saw you were lost too.

And of course I'll never forget that very first glimpse
as you danced and hid yourself away as I do
but I know you, I know you.

The distinction between sour and sweet meant nothing to me
As the room filled with water my heart ceased to beat.
I got carried away as the waves hit the wall
so lost without love, and praying to fall.
So when an opening came I took it with stride;
faced all the pain, and swallowed it whole
ignoring all hope, abandoning pride
I dove straight down, like the fish in the bowl.

And of course I’ll pray to forget that day
when I left myself behind, but kept going on my way
without any sense of direction, afraid to face reality,
and refusing to be okay.

And so we danced together.
Forgetting what hurt with everything else
and when the world reminded us as it always does,
of our half beating hearts and our unfinished loves
we simply held on to whatever we had
and when the room stopped spinning
we were always still there
messy hair and head, waking up in bed.

But the world becomes a little more focused
every time I watch you walk toward me.
The faint feeling of my heart becoming more than just routine
while the numbness, once overwhelming, gets lighter, serene.
So calculated, so sure, your cover coated well
but more and more each day it’s getting harder to tell.

We’re healing each other, a kiss at a time
sealing the deal as we’re waiting in line
We’ve decided to make the best of what we’re given
but considering it all, as I look you up and down,
I’ve wholly decided to keep you around;
my healer, my aspirin, my hold to solid ground.

You give me what I need
and I hope to give you yours
as we dance through life together
just pieces on the board.
You are the knight and I will be your queen,
forever moving with you, forever yours-healing.